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Saturday, August 22, 2009

In the Moment.

Yesterday was an ok day. My goal was to think and stay in the moment, and overall I was pretty successful. I remained content and optimistic throughout the majority of the day, thanks to the girls. They are all so warm and friendly, nonjudgemental and offered me great advice to stay strong. I'm really starting to get the hang of things and all the rules and little tricks to get by. I'm always cold though. I'm going to need to stock up on some sweaters and socks. ASAP. I also decided I desperately need a hobby. I'm thinking of taking up knitting or croqueting (sp?). Although yesterday was a decent day I think today will be more difficult. My caloric intake has increased so I had to re-work my meals for the weekend, which is such a stressful and anxiety provoking process. But, the girls have been offering me support and advice, so I WILL get through it. We're not really supposed to ever talk about food, calories or exercise.. we're supposed to focus on the rest of our lives, which is completely healthy and probably therapeutic, but sometimes we just can't help it.. it's part of the disorder. So far today has been ok, although I'm feeling quite anxious as I constantly have battles and disputes in my mind. Make them stop..please.
In other news, Carly and her mom are coming today! I'm SO incredibly excited and anxious to see her, I just have no idea what we'll do since I'm still confined to the unit.. Also, this morning we have a group family, educational session... we'll see how that goes.
Thank you all again for your continued support and lovely e-mails, it is greatly appreciated and makes everyday just a bit easier.
And I end this entry with a quote that inspired me to stay in the moment throughout the day:
"Later, when Jim went to prison for activities against the war, I was worried about whether he could endure the four walls of prison and sent him a very short letter: "Do you remember the tangerine we shared when we were together? Your being there is like the tangerine. Eat it and be one with it. Tomorrow it will be no more." "

Have a great weekend,
Bec

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