I smell the cranberry-pumpkin cookies baking in the oven. The smell is of sweet pumpkin and sugar.
I taste the warmth from pumpkin, chocolate and cranberry (p.s. best combination. ever.)
I hear the oven timer going off! Yikes!
I see the passionate, honest words from a friend upon my computer screen.
I feel the rush of energy flow from my heart, down my arms and out through my fingertips as I type this post.
Today is a beautiful day. The sun is shining, my face is glowing and it's my best friend's birthday. Carly turns 22 today and all I can think is 'Wow, I'm old enough to have a 22 year old for a best friend'. I am thankful for our friendship, as I value and treasure it deep within my heart. She is the missing part of me I never knew existed and the chance of meeting, let alone becoming best friends, is complete fate. Once upon a freshman year I attended my first Shabbat dinner at Hillel. It was one of the first Fridays of the school year and my mom had been nagging at me to go to Hillel just to 'check it out and see what it was like'. I'm pretty certain her exact words were, "You never know, you may find your future husband!" There was one other person I knew who was Jewish and happened to live on my floor. We didn't know each other nor feel any desire to want to get to know each other. Nonetheless, we went to Shabbos together that night to please our parents. It was the most awkward night of my life. Never in a million years would I conclude I'd be a co-founder of a Jewish-American a Capella group, a member of the Hillel student board, or sharing an apartment with that girl, Carly Adelmann. But alas, fate (aka Deb Jacoby) brought us together and I can't imagine my college experience without her. Thank you Deb, mom and Carly for persuading me to attend Shabbos dinner that one, fine night. I am also thankful for each and every current and past Vokols member. You all have inspired me in ways I never thought possible. I have learned and grown from each experience we've shared and I'm a better person because of it-- Thank you.
My bags are packed and I have not a care in the world-- I almost feel as if I'm floating on air, like I'm invincible. Despite my struggle with ambivalence towards recovery (yes, still) I try to make the best out of each and every day. I learn from my mistakes and my experiences and aim to live with no regrets, despite the deep rooted anger I possess from my past. I am certain my life could be much worse, so I tend to never take mine for granted. There's a song by Jack Johnson that I feel appropriately portrays a meaningful message. "But girl don't let your dreams be dreams, you know this living's not so hard as it seems. Don't let your dreams be dreams." Do those lyrics not capture the essence of self-actualization?
(shout out to our president)