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Sunday, March 7, 2010

Food Journey Part 2-- "Now I've been smiling thinking about the good things to come"

"A journey is like marriage.  The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it."-- John Steinbeck

Back to the farm life...
There was one particular meal I will never forget. Towards the end of our time at Oz Farm, each member of the 'gang' shared a story-- their food journey.  As we slowly dined, never taking a single bite for granted, each person had an opportunity to share what they eat, why and how it became that way.  Most stories began with childhood memories.  For instance, when I was younger I used to choose the apple over the cookie.  My lunches always consisted of yogurt (because I detested "mushy bread" sandwiches), a piece of fruit, some kind of chip or pretzel and two-- not one, not three, but two-- oreos or some other sweet treat.  What's more, my mom never kept 'sugary' cereals in the house, so whenever we went away it was such a treat to have lucky charms or fruit loops.  Dinner was always a starch, a protein and a vegetable, and dessert was never skipped.  All in all I grew up living a healthy lifestyle with the greatest, Jewish family-- no one ever went hungry.

In high school I was fortunate enough to be the girl who could eat anything and everything. I was praised for beating any guy in a pizza eating contest without gaining a single ounce.  Also, I was never afraid to try anything placed in front of me--from escargot to octopus, I'd try it, and most likely enjoy it.  Then I left for college, and thus my food journey took a turn for the worse, as depicted on the side bar of the blog. --->

So, post treatment, where do I find myself on my food journey?  As I attempt to eat intuitively, I close my eyes and remember the meals shared on Oz Farm.  My list of fear foods is getting shorter as control is slowly handed back to its rightful owner-- back to me.  I appreciate the importance of savoring each bite and observing the flavors that satisfy every taste bud.  I've been practicing mindful eating practices, thanks to time spent at Oz and a new attitude.

Lately, I've been... happy, to say the least.  The change in attitude can be attributed to many aspects of life and thoughts, including a new understanding of my place on the path towards full recovery.  I don't label myself as 'sick' anymore; Rather, I am in the process of getting better-- of getting back to the real me.  I'm like a long lost piece of artwork in the process of restoration.  And I'm okay with that.

I'm back in Yardley, enjoying the sunshine and thinking about the good things to come.  Spring break has rolled around (already?), thus I have ventured home to spend a few days with family, old friends and of course, my team.  Springtime is the most beautiful time of year, second to fall, of course.  It's as if everyone awakens from their hibernation, ready to embrace the seasons ahead.  With a smile on my face, good people in my life and faith kept in my back pocket, I'm ready to emerge and welcome spring with arms wide open.  Everyday is a struggle, but I find that if I shift my focus towards the positive aspects of my life, each moment is that much easier.

Though I am not with the Jewish Farm School this spring break, with a new attitude and outlook I hope to further my food journey.  Last night I cooked a delicious, ethnic Mexican meal and tonight I challenge myself to Italian (aka pasta)... I think I can, I think I can I'm ready, I am.

I encourage all to take a few moments and recall their own food journeys.  It helps tell our story, and share a little of who we are.


I need to make a shout out to the beautiful, insightful and fabulous EMILY. She sent me the most amazing, thoughtful package. I'll elaborate in my next post. Thank you so much, lovely lady :)


  1. Hey, thanks for sharing this. I can so relate to not liking the mushy sandwiches :) And my mom never had sugary cereals either so I loved going to my aunts house where I could have Lucky Charms (my favorite).

    I too find myself looking back at the way I used to eat when I was a kid and trying to figure out how to eat intuitively again. There were a lot of times in my child when my eating was disordered but also a lot of times when I just ate and thought nothing of it.

  2. ahh becbec i miss you so much! i'm so glad to see you are doing well :] i knew you would be okay! <3 stay strong darlin.

    p.s. YOU look cute when you smile ;]

  3. so glad you are READY :). awesome story. love that the real you is coming out and you are feeling good!

  4. aw good i am so glad you are so happy nad really starting to feel like yourself. you deserve health <3

  5. Hey girl, what a lovely post!! So glad you are doing wonderfully these days :-)

  6. girl i can relate to this SO MUCH. dinner was always meat, veggie, starch and a glass of milk. we could never leave the table until the veggies and milk were drank. no dessert if the plate wasnt finished. lunches were packed and relatively healthy. food was real, or homemade.

    then i went to college... everything flipped a 180 and here i am in recovery...

  7. Thank you so much for sharing your journey with us!

  8. thanks for sharing with us and for stopping by my blog earlier :)

  9. Hey Bec,
    Thanks so much for your comment, especially since it helped me find your fabulous blog! =)
    You write so well and this sounds weird, but reading this post calmed me and made me feel like yes, everthing IS going to be okay.
    It's wonderful to read about your happiness, and that you know that continuing on this path will only lead to good things, and to you further discovering the real you!
    You're right, it definitely is a struggle, but there is so much to look forward to and so much to be thankful and positive about. I love your outlook. =)
    Well done on tackling Mexican (YUM) and good luck with the Italian food! You can do it girl!
    Adding you to my blogroll now =D

  10. Love your blog! And thanks for commenting on mine. I don't know how much 'insight' I have, but I've definetly learned a lot through being on this journey to health. A lot about myself and others. I'm always looking for more people who share their life stories and in their own way, teach me about life. Your blog does a great job of that, so I will keep reading!

  11. aww thanks so much for your sweet comment girl!
    i totally agree-when i was banned from exercise i was SO Thankful..makes your truly appreciate the important blessings in life!

  12. Oh REbecca, this made me smile...reading about the simple joys and memories that you're gaining through a simple act of eating...I hope you recover all the joys that come with it...and soon that it'll be second nature to you!

  13. Great to hear all of this, I'm proud! Stay strong girl, you're worth it!

    xxx Julia (Taste of Living)

  14. Great to hear all of this, I'm proud! Stay strong girl, you're worth it!

    xxx Julia (Taste of Living)

  15. Great to hear all of this, I'm proud! Stay strong girl, you're worth it!

    xxx Julia (Taste of Living)

  16. What a lovely post :-)

    Thanks for commenting on my blog, and you are right, food journeys are very important. My relationship with food is ever changing, but now I am enjoying it as a right rather than a privilege.

    Sarah x